The advancement of technology throughout the 21^st century has been incredible.

The World Wide Web was released to the public in 1991. That’s not that long ago when you consider how far we’ve come since then.

It didn’t take long for home computers to start to become more prominent. However, dial-up internet made things difficult. But by the 2000s, broadband internet became popular and internet speeds have just gotten progressively faster ever since.

As much as the internet has helped us in terms of innovation, it has also stripped something away from us as a society: the human connection.

Now, in 2023, we are all connected to the internet. At all times. We couldn’t escape it if we wanted to. We take our phones with us everywhere we go, without fail. I don’t know about you, but I feel naked without my phone.

This is a stark contrast to the days of old when we all had to go outside or make a phone call to see each other. Times sure have changed.

One thing the internet has drastically changed, and not for the better, is dating.

Dating in the modern world is so frustrating. Personally, I’m basically at my wit’s end and so fed up with it. At this point, I’m pretty much done with it. I can’t deal with the superficial nature of it.

The abundance of choices is not a good thing. It allows us to swipe left or right on people with no actual idea of who they are or what they’re about.

And it’s made meeting someone in real life more difficult. With the way apps like Tinder have taken over the dating world, it’s become a struggle.

Online dating has contributed to poor self-image, trust issues, depression, and overall mental damage. Not to mention how awkward

The Pew Research Center conducted a study in 2020 that has some staggering numbers:

 

• 45% of users reported that online dating left them feeling more frustrated than hopeful.
• 60% of women aged 18-34 say someone on a dating app continued to contact them after they said they were not interested.
• 57% report that another user sent them an unwanted sexually explicit message or image.
• 44% report that someone called them an offensive name.
• 19% say they have had someone threaten physical harm.
• 53% of women say that dating apps are an unsafe way to meet people.
• 26% report the experience was mostly negative.

 

Many other studies have been completed in recent years and they all come up with similar results. It’s not pretty. It seems to affect men’s self-esteem the most, and for women, it damages body image. For men, issues stem from a lack of matches and attention, while many women tend to be overwhelmed by the sheer volume of matches. An abundance of choice isn’t a good thing. It becomes so much easier to give up on a prospective relationship when there are so many options at the swipe of a finger.

While there are some apps like Hinge that match you more based on personality matches, there is still a lot of work to be done.

We’ve got to find a way out of this because this is not a healthy environment for young people to be stuck dealing with.

I can tell you from experience that this just isn’t a sustainable system. But I don’t see a way out.

Other studies from the Pew Research Center show some haunting numbers:

• 88% of online dating users NEVER find a relationship.
• 15% of people say they’re addicted to the process of finding a date.
• Millennials and Gen-Z are 125% more likely to feel addicted to dating than older generations.

 

Dating apps are also filled with so many scammers as well. You really need to be aware of sketchy profiles that aren’t what they say they are. The dreaded catfish. Catfishing is when you misrepresent who you are on these apps. Sometimes the profile pictures are stolen from the internet.  It’s scary, but you really don’t know who you’re talking to until you meet them in person. Even if it is the right person, their profile could be filled with lies or the pictures could be outdated.

My advice: NEVER give out your personal information, don’t send pictures, and ALWAYS be careful. It’s easy to think with your heart over your head, but you must slow down and assess the situation.

Here are a few signs to look out for:

• Avoiding calls
• No online presence on other platforms
• Very few friends or followers
• A very recently created profile
• “Professional” pictures

Beyond catfishing, there are other things to look out for, like ghosting.

Ghosting is when someone seems interested, but suddenly, they just drop off the face of the earth. This leaves people feeling like they did something wrong when really, it’s usually more to do with the other person’s commitment issues.

If you’re going to use dating apps, you’d better be prepared for a It’s not an easy thing to deal with and can negatively impact your self-worth and overall mental well-being. It’s no wonder that the younger generation suffers from depression at a scary rate.

I can tell you from experience, this isn’t a great generation to grow up in. I’ve struggled with depression for many years, and it took a lot of effort to climb out of that dark pit of despair.

It’s crazy. We have so much at our fingertips, which you’d think would make life easier. It does, but it also makes everything so much more complicated.

Despite all the potential drawbacks that come with online dating, I think that there are ways to use it in a healthier way. For one, I’d recommend not using Tinder and opting for apps that match you more based on compatibility than the basic swiping left or right based on looks.

But really, I think you’re better off leaving the dating apps and trying to find a partner the old-fashioned way. There’s so much out there to see in this world and our overreliance on our phones to get us through the day has become a serious problem. I worry about the path we may be heading down as a society.

At its core, this problem extends well beyond dating apps. Social media fosters so much negativity and bullying. Whenever I go on these sites, I always see people fighting, bickering, and tearing each other down. It’s sad.

We’re living in an important time in human history. But hopefully, we can figure out a way to use today’s technology in a more positive way. The current system just isn’t cutting it.

Not to get too off track there, but I think it all goes together.

The Bottom Line:

If you want to use dating apps, they can be fun. But you just need to be careful about the way you use them. There are better alternatives to Tinder, such as Bumble, Hinge, Match, eHarmony, and Plenty of Fish. These apps all use a personality algorithm to find more suitable potential matches.

So go ahead and see what’s out there if you want. But I think we’d all be a lot better off if we had to leave our homes to find a date. Convenience isn’t usually the best thing for us.

Whether you use these apps or not, I wish you good luck.