Remembering The Handshake & The Beginning of New Social Contracts

As the days darken and an encroaching Canadian Winter chases away any inkling of warmth, we turn to anticipate the curveballs that a Covid-19 holiday is likely to lob at us with. A second wave threatens to roll over our province and as a result, we have been once again ordered to avoid one another. Many have struggled emotionally, some psychologically, others economically and I awkwardly. Awkwardly due to the inordinate amount of chance encounters with acquaintances that have been punctuated with expectant pauses or elaborate elbow-lead maneuvers in place of a simple handshake. Among the somewhat comical measures that our political class has instructed us to take such as “avoid speaking moistly” (Prime Minister Justin Trudeau), to avoid shaking hands has also been advised.

Before I continue, allow me to assert that the virus is real and if you can do something reasonable to avoid spreading or catching it, you should by all means acquiesce. However, as we look around at the destruction done, it is sometimes difficult to distinguish that which was inflicted by the virus from that which has been infringed as a reaction to the virus. We have many times heard of a solution being worse than the problem and as we continue to work at bracing against a second wave and rebuilding we also continue to come to terms with what we have lost and what we are losing. It’s important to acknowledge that the implemented measures are not solutions but rather ‘trade-offs’. Locking things down and quarantining the public may appear like a solution, pushing down the number of cases, the reality is that the public state of health has deteriorated on other fronts. In place of cases and deaths directly caused by the virus what we have instead seen is a rise in homicides, serious assaults, hate crimes, home invasions, arsons, and assaults on officers (Vancouver police department crime statistics). This is not to mention an increase in alcoholism, depression, and many other psychological issues germinating in the public consciousness.

Atop of all the calamities, we are now faced with a fundamental restructuring of our society. I’m not talking about ‘The Great Reset’ here either, I already did that in this other article: ‘Turning the Economy Off And On Again.’ Rather, I am talking about the social contracts that form our everyday interactions. Yes, the handshake; a gesture truly at the core of what it means to be human. Humans have evolved with a basic primary advantage of hands with opposable thumbs. These neatly organized and well-paired collections of limbed digits have allowed us to grip things, and hence not only survive but also thrive. How perfect is it then, that an acknowledgment of interaction between is facilitated by the reaching out and gripping of another hand! You and me, we both have hands, and that binds us together…literally and figuratively. Perhaps I am being overdramatic about something rudimentary, but if I am romanticizing handshakes, it is because you never truly appreciate what you’ve got until it’s gone. Shaking hands is cross-cultural and spans through history as far back as ancient Greece. We have used shaking hands to initiate greetings, symbolize a deal well made, congratulate one another, and to feel out one another quite literally. “Glad to meet you.” “Glad to have met you.” “Welcome.” “Thanks.” And “You’re alright.” Interviews and business meetings have begun and ended with handshakes, high school graduations have facilitated them countlessly and encounter with male relatives often go the way of the handshake as well. It is a beyond-common gesture used to carry much meaning within a simple action. The action itself is immortalized in literal tablets of ancient stone, stretching back through history as far back as ancient Greece and Assyria.

It is conservatively estimated that thirty percent of our communication is non-verbal, with much of our intention behind our gesticulations, gestures, tone of voice, waggle of the eyebrows, and everything but the words that we’ve actually said. Often in the absence of handshakes, we have seen fist bumps, high fives, and hugs. The pandemic forced us to reel back our limbs in a fit of corona-phobia, however, and the physical contact that we once used to reassure each other that we are not ghosts or holograms is certainly endangered. The proposed alternatives, in my opinion, are falling flat as well; the elbow bump feels as though it defeats the purpose by causing us to have to come close enough to employ it, and never once have I managed to do so without sharing the sentiment of wishing to dispose of it. I am reminded of when certain campuses and settings deemed hand-clapping applause to be too violent and instead advocated for slam poetry praising snaps or in worse cases, jazz hands.

The loss of the gesture is something akin to the heralding of new social contracts. A re-negotiation of the way we consider one another has already been impacted in large ways with the implementation of the six-foot radius of social distancing and the obscurement of our most distinguishing and emotive features behind string suspended face cloths. The only form of affection that people feel comfortable asking of one another is to like, share, and subscribe while we’re drawn physically away from each other under threat of legal action. It is a sign of greater isolation and alienation to come, one which I have been pessimistic about since March when a few were naive enough to believe two weeks to slow the spread was anything more than a fake carrot for us to follow. I am more than happy to walk a six-foot circle around any strangers, or politely explain to the cashier that I am trying to comply with safety measures but that the mask is also for robbery, but I look forward to being allowed to execute the six-stage handshakes symbolic of brotherhood that denote my friendships. The important thing is that we continue to find ways to demonstrate that we are still human, and not the newest form of terminator come to enact mechanized retribution. Let’s shake on it.