YouTube Culture: A Nostalgic Revival

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Do you miss the golden era of YouTube? Those days when summer mornings meant grabbing breakfast, propping up your iPad, and diving into a YouTube video without a care in the world? For many, that routine hasn’t changed, but the platform itself has evolved drastically. Unlike the endless scrolling of TikTok, YouTube offers a more immersive and calming experience. Instead of short bursts of overstimulation, it allows for deeper engagement, something we’ve slowly lost in today’s fast-paced media consumption.

This perspective might vary depending on how you engage with social media. As a woman, the way we consume content is different from a male audience, but the nostalgia for classic YouTube spans across genders. Personally, I love a good vlog—those raw, unfiltered glimpses into someone’s life that feel like a virtual FaceTime call. It’s fascinating how some creators thrive on TikTok but seem like they were made for YouTube. If they committed to long-form content, they could excel beyond their short-form success.

Take the beauty community, for example. The YouTube beauty era of 2012-2016 was an era, but looking back, it’s shocking how curated and unrealistic it all was. Many creators have since opened up about the pressure to maintain a picture-perfect image, shaping an unattainable standard for young viewers. Thankfully, today’s media landscape has shifted. While some argue that social media is still full of facades, we now have a choice—we can seek out creators who prioritize authenticity over perfection.

However, there’s a fine line between authenticity and para-social relationships. It’s easy to feel like you “know” your favourite YouTuber, but at the end of the day, they don’t know you. They engage with comments; they are entertainers sharing pieces of their lives. Finding common ground with an influencer is great, but maintaining realistic boundaries is just as important.

YouTube still has the power to create meaningful content. Creators like Love Island’s Leah Kateb shine in long-form videos, making YouTube a better fit for them than TikTok. Spencer Barbosa is another example, her content feels like stepping into a different world, providing an escape from the rapid-fire nature of short-form media.

Looking ahead, I hope YouTube’s culture continues to evolve in a way that embraces realism rather than toxic perfection. Long-form content not only fosters deeper connections but also helps rebuild our dwindling attention spans. If we can reclaim that slower, more immersive way of consuming media, it might just change the way we interact with the world around us.

Formula 1 Roundup: A Thrilling Start to the Season

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Lights out and away we go—Formula 1 is back, and the 2025 season is already delivering drama! One team that has set the paddock on fire? McLaren. Kicking off the season with a spectacular win at the Australian Grand Prix, Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri proved that McLaren is here to fight.

The Australian Grand Prix was anything but predictable. Right from the formation lap, chaos ensued. New Visa Cash App RB driver Isack Hadjar suffered a heartbreaking DNF before the race even started. And let’s talk about the weather, it was relentless. Rain, dry patches, and everything in between made this one of the most challenging races in recent memory. The tricky conditions led to several retirements, including Jack Doohan, Liam Lawson, and Gabriel Bortoleto. Even seasoned veterans like Carlos Sainz making his debut with Williams and Fernando Alonso fell victim to the slippery track. It was a crushing moment for Sainz, who had looked promising all weekend in free practice.

Despite the chaos, one of the biggest talking points was the battle between Norris and reigning world champion Max Verstappen. It was a nail-biting chase, with Verstappen relentlessly hunting Norris down like a shark eyeing its prey. However, Norris held his ground, managing the gaps beautifully even when Verstappen had DRS advantage. It was an intense showdown that showcased just how much McLaren has closed the gap to Red Bull over the off-season.

Another standout performance came from Oscar Piastri. The young Australian was putting in a strong drive until a late-race slip sent him off into the grass, forcing him to reverse back onto the track. This put him a lap down, but thanks to multiple safety cars, he fought his way back and finished ninth still in the points. It was an impressive recovery, though it could have been a double podium opportunity for McLaren or a first time Aussie win in Australia.

The race had countless DNFs, unpredictable weather shifts, and exhilarating battles on track. One moment it was pouring rain, the next it was bone dry. It was hot and cold, lap after lap. But for McLaren fans, this race was a dream start to the season.

With only two races down, the season is just getting started. What are your predictions? Which teams do you think will rise to the challenge? One thing’s for sure—if the Australian Grand Prix was any indication, 2025 is going to be a season to remember!

Vancouver Food Culture: Brunch Bliss at Wooden Spoon

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If you’re looking for a cozy and delicious brunch spot after exploring White Rock, Wooden Spoon is a must-visit. Whether you’re craving something sweet or savoury, this spot delivers an unforgettable dining experience.

Wooden Spoon boasts an incredible brunch and lunch menu, and its warm, rustic atmosphere adds to the charm. With a cozy, cabin-like aesthetic, it has a welcoming vibe that makes you feel right at home.

One dish that absolutely blew me away was their BBQ Smoked Meat Poutine. I still dream about it to this day. As a self-proclaimed poutine lover, I can confidently say this is one of the best I’ve ever had, at least in BC. The balance of rich, sweet, and salty flavours, combined with that mesmerizing cheese pull, makes it an item you simply cannot miss. My boyfriend and I couldn’t get enough, we were practically fighting over the last bite!

For dessert, the Tiramisu French Toast was the perfect way to end the meal. It wasn’t overly sweet, which I appreciated, and the creamy layer of vanilla espresso cream on top elevated the dish to another level. The addition of cookie crumbles gave it a satisfying texture and a delightful crunch. If you’re a tiramisu fan, this dish will not disappoint.

Beyond the food, Wooden Spoon captures a distinct Canadian essence, much like Burgoo. Its rustic, woodsy vibe makes you feel like you’re tucked away in a cozy Whistler cabin, fuelling up before hitting the slopes. The restaurant itself is on the smaller side, so I highly recommend making a reservation or visiting during off-peak hours. If you’re planning a weekday brunch, you’re more likely to snag a table without much wait.

Overall, Wooden Spoon is a gem in White Rock that deserves a spot on your must-visit list. From the inviting atmosphere to the mouthwatering dishes, it’s an experience worth savouring. If you’re a brunch enthusiast, this place is calling your name!

 

 

Vancouver Food Culture: Bite at Burgoo’s

Located at 3096 Main St, Vancouver, Burgoo is the perfect spot when you’re craving a warm, hearty meal. With a versatile menu offering everything from creamy mac and cheese to savoury risotto, this place is ideal for any occasion.

Burgoo’s atmosphere has a charming cabin-like feel, with plenty of nods to Canadian history. The rustic, forest-inspired décor makes it a great spot if you prefer a more relaxed, less overstimulating dining experience. The ambiance is calm yet sociable, striking a perfect balance. Plus, the staff is incredibly welcoming and always happy to help with recommendations.

For an appetizer, you can’t go wrong with the calamari—it’s always a solid choice. But if seafood isn’t your thing, they also offer chicken karaage and cauliflower bites, both of which came highly recommended by our server. It’s up to you to decide which one will take the cake!

We didn’t order any specialty drinks, but Burgoo has a great bar stocked with a wide selection of local options. From BC wines to craft beers and ciders, there’s plenty to explore if you’re in the mood for a little drink.

Now, let’s talk about the star of the show: the mac and cheese. This dish is unbelievably rich, with a cheese pull so perfect it should be legendary. It’s topped with carnitas-style pulled pork that adds a sweet and savoury twist, making for an unforgettable bite. As someone who has tried a lot of mac and cheese, I can confidently say this one ranks in my top five.

I didn’t get the chance to try their soups and sandwiches, but based on my TikTok research, they are a hot topic of conversation whenever Burgoo is mentioned. The Gooey Cheese Grillers, in particular, seemed to be a fan favourite, so if you’re a grilled cheese lover, it’s definitely worth trying.

And if you have room for dessert, the chocolate mousse is a must. It’s rich, decadent, and pure bliss from the very first bite. Trust me, you’ll want to save space for it!

If you’re planning your Vancouver food adventures this spring, make sure Burgoo is on your list. The cozy atmosphere, incredible comfort food, and nostalgic rustic charm make it feel like a trip back in time.

Vancouver Food Culture: A Taste of Osteria Elio Volpe

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Vancouver’s food culture is growing every day, and I have some fantastic spots for you to try. I’ll be writing a series on places I’ve checked out, so you can find your next go-to dining experience. Fair warning…a lot of them are Italian! 

One of my top recommendations is Osteria Elio Volpe, located at 540 W 17th Ave, Vancouver. This restaurant is incredibly versatile, perfect for a girl’s night, a romantic date, or even a celebration with family and friends. The menu is exquisite, offering a variety of pastas, pizzas, and delicious starters. If you’re looking for a place that, has it all; great food, stunning ambiance, and a welcoming staff. 

From the moment you step inside, the aesthetics will captivate you. The restaurant combines a muted colour palette with rich Italian charm while incorporating modern design elements. It strikes the perfect balance between cozy and sophisticated. 

Now, let’s talk about what to order. Start with the Semolina Parker House Rolls with pecorino butter and sesame sprinkled on top. These rolls will change your life. They come as soft, fluffy buns arranged like a flower, easily pulled apart while still warm and fresh. Spread a generous amount of butter on them, and with that first bite, you’ll understand why I’ll never get over them. The delicate, savoury-yet-slightly-sweet flavour simply melts in your mouth. It is easily one of the best starters I’ve ever had. 

For your entrée, I didn’t get a chance to try the pasta, but there are plenty of reviews online and on TikTok. However, if you’re in the mood for pizza, I have two recommendations. If you want to keep it classic, go for the Margherita pizza. It’s perfectly delicate with a cracker-thin crust that won’t leave you feeling overly full or sluggish—just satisfied. If you’re feeling adventurous, try the Hot Honey Pepperoni pizza. It’s a game-changer. The combination of pepperoni, sweet honey, and jalapeños creates a perfect balance of heat and sweetness, making each bite an explosion of flavour. When it’s fresh out of the oven, it’s absolutely divine. 

Pair your meal with their blood orange sparkling drink, it’s refreshing and pairs beautifully with the bread rolls and pizza. The overall experience at Osteria Elio Volpe is top-notch, from the food to the service. The staff is incredibly attentive; for example, while my partner was in the washroom, a server neatly folded his napkin without me even noticing a small detail. They’re also super helpful if you need some help understanding the menu. 

I highly recommend this spot, not only for its aesthetics but also for the impeccable service and unforgettable flavors. It’s easily in my top ten places to eat in Vancouver! 

Shopping Canadian Brands

Local Vancouver Clothing Brands

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Strawberry Milk Mob

Strawberry Milk Mob is a locally owned swimwear brand based in Vancouver, and their bikinis are seriously adorable. The designs are diverse, catering to all personal styles, and I’ve heard nothing but great reviews. They make swimwear for everyone, so you and your partner could even rock a matching bikini and shorts set! The brand launched in early 2018, and its founder, Georgia Costello, skyrocketed to success after going viral on TikTok. They’ve done pop-up shops in downtown Vancouver before, and I can’t wait for their next one. The prices are reasonable, so if you’re planning a vacation or just prepping early for summer, this is a local brand you should check out immediately.

8th and Main

If you’re looking for that effortlessly cool, chic style, 8th and Main is a must-visit. They have an amazing selection of pieces, including vintage finds that give your wardrobe a timeless touch. Founded in 2003 in Victoria, BC, as a secondhand store, it has expanded massively over the years. Now, they carry a wide range of clothing and accessories. After a decade in business, they opened their 8th and Main store in Vancouver’s Mount Pleasant neighbourhood. If you’re looking to elevate your style with trendy yet classic pieces, this is the place for you.

Roots

This one’s a Canadian classic—if you don’t already own at least one piece from Roots, what are you doing? I still have my Roots sweatpants from 2018, and they’re in amazing condition. Roots has been a staple brand in Canada for decades, offering everything from cozy loungewear to stylish bags for people on the go. While their prices are on the higher side, the quality and longevity of their products make up for it. For example, my mom has been using the same Roots bag for work every day for six years, and it’s still in fantastic shape. If you’re into timeless, high-quality Canadian fashion, Roots is the way to go.

Lululemon

Everyone knows this one, but did you know Lululemon is a Canadian brand? Even better—it was founded in Vancouver in 1998 by Chip Wilson! It’s wild to think that one of the world’s top athletic wear brands started here. While Lululemon is definitely on the pricier side, their pieces are durable and stylish. They recently dropped a leopard-print collection, and it’s absolutely adorable. Lululemon has been a go-to brand for years and has never lost its popularity. If you’re in the market for high-quality athletic wear, shopping locally at Lululemon is a great option.

Grocery Shopping: Supporting Canadian Brands

Buying groceries can be tricky when trying to support local brands—sometimes we unknowingly grab American products, and that’s okay! We all slip up now and then. Some of my favourite snacks are American-made, and while it sucks, there are always Canadian alternatives. Don’t stress too much—just be a little more mindful when shopping. Check the labels on your fruits and veggies to see where they’re grown, and opt for Canadian products when you can. That said, sometimes American brands are cheaper, and with the economy today, we all need to save where we can. No judgment here! If you’re looking to buy more Canadian-made groceries, here are a couple of places to start.

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Real Canadian Superstore

Superstore is a great place to find Canadian brands, including the well-known No Name brand. They also carry a variety of locally made snacks and food products. One helpful tip—when you’re in the produce section, check the labels to see where your fruits and vegetables come from. Most of the time, there’s no noticeable difference between Canadian and American brands in terms of quality or taste. And if you’re an Optimum user, you can earn points while shopping, which is a nice bonus!

Shoppers Drug Mart

Okay, I have to admit—I love Shoppers Drug Mart. Do the rising prices sometimes break my heart? Absolutely. Do I still shop there? Without a doubt. While their skincare and body care products can be pricey, their sales are amazing when they happen. I could spend hours browsing the skincare and makeup aisles—I just love it. Shoppers is a Canadian staple, and I find it super convenient since there’s always one near me, whether at home or work. While it doesn’t have the grocery selection of Superstore, it’s perfect for grabbing a quick snack, a drink, or an everyday essential. If you’re in a rush and need something convenient, Shoppers Drug Mart is a great local option.

Shopping Locally: More Than Just Clothes and Groceries

These are just a few Canadian brands and local businesses to support, but there are so many more out there. We’ve mostly focused on clothing brands, but there’s a whole world of Canadian-made products—from food and drinks to beauty and home goods. If you’re looking for more local options, social media is a great place to start.

And beyond just shopping locally, why not check out a farmers’ market in your area? Farmers’ markets pop up all over the country during spring and summer, and they’re a great way to buy fresh, local produce while supporting small businesses. Plus, they make for a fun weekend activity! Put on a cute outfit, grab a coffee, and romanticize the experience—you’ll be supporting your community while having a great time.

At the end of the day, buying locally isn’t just about politics—it’s about supporting Canadian businesses and making conscious choices. Whether you’re picking out a new bikini, grabbing groceries, or looking for trendy outfits, there are plenty of local options that allow you to shop Canadian and feel good about it. So go explore, discover new brands, and enjoy shopping local!

What to Add to Your Playlist in 2025

As much as I’m a huge sports fan and love to yap about it, I’m also a massive music lover. So, I figured, why not share some song recommendations? Over the past few months—and even throughout last year—I’ve discovered some incredible tracks that have made their way onto my playlist. If you’re a big music fan, you might want to add these to yours as well. Most of these songs are fairly new, while some are a little older, but all of them deserve a spot in 2025. So, let’s get into it.

Genius – Ravyn Lenae

OK, Genius by Ravyn Lenae—so good. This song has a groovy beat, and even though the production is pretty simple, the lyrics are amazing. Her voice is so sultry and soothing that you get completely captivated. It’s like you’re transported to another world when you listen to it.

This track is off her Bird’s Eye album, which dropped in August 2024, and the entire project is incredible—both lyrically and musically. Ravyn Lenae is such a gem in the R&B scene. Her sound has this indie-R&B fusion that I love. It’s not overwhelming, but it’s definitely something you can vibe to when you need a moment of calm. Her music brings me peace, yet it still has a funky groove that keeps things interesting.

Love Me Not (Both Versions) – Ravyn Lenae & Rex Orange County

I discovered Love Me Not in October 2024 and instantly fell in love with it. Then, boom—it blew up on TikTok. A part of me was a little sad that it became so popular, but I can’t be mad because it gave her the recognition she deserves.

There are two versions of this song: the original, which is just her vocals, and a remix featuring Rex Orange County. His voice blends perfectly with hers, and it creates a cool conversational dynamic in the song. The lyrics tell a story about being in a relationship that isn’t really serving you, yet you keep coming back. Having two different perspectives makes the song even more immersive.

It’s so addicting. I’ve played it on repeat, and I’m still not tired of it. It’s groovier than Genius—a little more upbeat—but still carries that same smooth, hypnotic quality. I love that it became popular on social media because now even more people get to appreciate it.

Busy Woman – Sabrina Carpenter

I first heard Busy Woman at a Sabrina Carpenter concert in November. It was one of her Spin the Bottle songs, and I had no idea it was from her upcoming deluxe album.

She just dropped the deluxe edition of Short n’ Sweet recently, featuring songs like 15 Minutes and Busy Woman. I love Busy Woman because it’s snappy, full of attitude, and packed with charisma. Sabrina knows how to write insanely catchy lyrics—like, she always has that one line that just hits.

This song is so fun and empowering. It’s got this retro ’70s-’80s vibe that makes you want to throw on a cute outfit, do your hair, and twirl around your room while getting ready. If you need a confidence boost before heading out, this is the perfect song to blast.

Sally, When the Wine Runs Out – Role Model

This one is from Role Model’s album Kansas Anymore, which came out last year. I loved that album from the moment it dropped, so when he released the deluxe version alongside Sabrina Carpenter’s, I was all over it.

Sally When the Wine Runs Out has a country-twang mixed with an upbeat, danceable energy. It makes you want to do a little line dance, and I love that about his music—catchy and fun but still packed with emotion.

The thing about Role Model’s music is that even when the lyrics are sad, the melodies are so infectious that you just have to move. It’s that perfect balance of heartbreak and good vibes. I already know this is going to be on repeat for me all spring and summer. I can picture it now: driving with the windows down, sun shining, headed to the beach—Sally When the Wine Runs Out blasting in the background. That’s the kind of song this is.

Nokia – Drake & PARTYNEXTDOOR

This one dropped on February 14th as part of Drake and PARTYNEXTDOOR’s collab album. And let me tell you, it was a much-needed release from both of them.

Nokia is just classic Drake. From the moment you press play, it’s got you hooked. It’s such a club song—perfect for dancing and having a good time. It has this fusion of ’80s, ’90s, and early 2000s vibes, which makes it even more addictive.

One thing I love about this album is that a lot of the songs have a two-part structure, where the first half sounds different from the second. It keeps things exciting, and Nokia is no exception. Drake has mastered the art of making ridiculous yet ridiculously catchy songs, and this one is no different. Another thing I absolutely love about this song beyond it’s surface level listening if you have a good ear you can hear a phone ringtone going off which I thought was a great touch to the song and quite fitting for it’s lyrics as well.

Another honourable mention from the album? CN Tower. It’s the perfect opener—sets the mood right away. Definitely worth a listen.

Final Thoughts

So, those are some of the songs you should add to your 2025 playlist. If you’re into R&B, indie, and even a little bit of country influence, you’ll definitely find something you like. My taste is kind of all over the place, but I think that’s the beauty of a great playlist—having variety keeps things interesting.

Give these songs a listen, and let me know what you think! Hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

From Going Out to Staying In

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I am 20 years old now. That is quite young—no doubt about it. However, I’ve experienced a major shift in my life since turning 19. So let me give you a bit of backstory. I turned 19 in October 2023, and when that happened, I started going out a lot. I met my two best friends, and we spent a lot of time together. The weather was still pretty cold, but we didn’t let that stop us. We were going out every weekend—drinking, partying, and just living life.

It became a routine: Friday night, Saturday night, different bars, different places, but the same cycle of drinking and partying. It was wild, fun, and exciting because everything felt so new to us. And while the fun was undeniable, waking up hungover for Saturday morning shifts? Not so much. Regardless, those nights made for some great memories. We probably still will have some in the future, but lately, I feel like we’ve all taken a pause on that lifestyle—at least, I know I have.

This all happened before I got into a relationship, and things really changed after that. My boyfriend drinks and enjoys a good party, but for me, I’ve slowed down. I just don’t have the same desire anymore. I don’t miss waking up hungover, feeling sluggish, or dealing with the aftermath of heavy drinking. It’s weird because I used to be a tequila girl, but now I’m a one-drink-only kind of person. Mixing drinks? Absolutely not. And honestly, one particular night changed everything for me.

Let me paint the picture. It was a summer night, and my coworkers, friends, boyfriend, and I decided to go out. We got ready, looking cute, taking pictures, having fun at the pregame at my place. Then we headed to Tap House, a bar in Coquitlam, to meet up with more friends. The night started off great—we got a huge jug of some jungle juice, started taking shots, drinking, dancing, and just having a blast. But at some point, I blacked out. Genuinely do not remember what happened for the time we had at Tap House. However the one thing I remember is my friends scamming dudes for toonies to play a basketball game in the arcade section but they were just snatching toonies for fun lol.

I remember walking to Denny’s afterward, but it’s all a blur. My boyfriend had to carry me because I could barely walk. We got to Denny’s, and I sat at a big table with everyone, but then I just disappeared to the bathroom. And that’s where the real nightmare began—I threw up twice, everything I had eaten (which wasn’t much). My best friend held my hair back, and all the girls in my group were checking on me. It was bad. After that, I felt so nauseous, but we managed to get an Uber back to my place.

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The next morning was even worse. I woke up with no memory of how the night ended, just the memory of throwing up at Denny’s. And then the cycle continued—throwing up from 9 AM until just before I had to leave for a tea party my sister’s best friend was hosting. Yes, a wholesome, fairy-tale-esque tea party was planned for that day. And there I was, suffering from what I suspect was borderline alcohol poisoning. I could barely move, throwing up repeatedly, unable to make it back to bed without another trip to the bathroom.

At some point, my boyfriend brought me a cookie, which was sweet, but I was in no state to appreciate it. My older sister was furious with me (rightfully so) because we had this tea party planned, and I had gotten absolutely trashed the night before. But miraculously, after my final round of throwing up, I felt like a new person. I pulled myself together, freshened up, threw on a dress, and somehow managed to make it to the tea party. And let me tell you, it was the most wholesome, peaceful, and adorable event—complete with delicate pastries and tea, all while I was recovering from the absolute mess of the night before. Talk about the duality of womanhood.

That night was my wake-up call. Ever since then, I’ve been terrified of drinking too much. When we went on a camping trip after that, I didn’t drink at all. I took on the role of the cook and cleaner for the trip, keeping everything in order while everyone else partied. I became the “mom” of the group, making sure things didn’t get too out of control.

Right now, my life is just too busy for constant nights out. I have school, responsibilities, things to take care of. And honestly, going out all the time just isn’t a priority for me anymore. Some of my friends still give me a hard time—“Kat, you never go out anymore!”—but the truth is, I can’t afford to. First of all, it’s freezing outside, and I’m not about to freeze in a cute little outfit just to go out drinking. Second, I’ve realized that I’d rather wait for warm weather to really enjoy going out again. My mood depends so much on the weather—I am a summer girl through and through. Once the sun is shining and it’s warm again, I might be more open to nights out. But for now, I’m happy staying in.

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Have you ever had an experience like this? Maybe not exactly the same, but a moment that made you stop and realize you needed a change? Sometimes, those moments are necessary. They force you to slow down, reassess, and figure out what really matters. And for me, that night at Denny’s was exactly that—a hard lesson learned, but one I’m ultimately grateful for.

Balancing Relationships and Yourself

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Navigating relationships can be tough, and figuring out how to balance everything can feel overwhelming. I’ve always been pretty open about my experiences with relationships and friendships—how I got into my first relationship, how I’ve tried to manage friendships, and just generally how I’ve tried to navigate it all. Lately, though, it’s been hitting me harder than usual. Maybe it’s the time of year—midterms creeping up, work getting busier, life just feeling heavier. Whatever it is, I’ve been struggling to keep things in balance, and writing about it helps me put things into perspective.

Over the past few months, I’ve felt like I’ve been at war with myself. I’ve been trying to figure out how to maintain a healthy relationship while also making sure I’m still showing up for my friendships. I want to be there for everyone—I always have. That’s just who I am. If you need me, I’m there. Whether it’s my boyfriend, my best friend, my sister, or anyone I care about, I’ll drop everything to be there. But that can be exhausting, and sometimes, the people closest to you need more from you than you can give. And while that’s normal, it can also be really frustrating because you start to lose yourself in the process.

My boyfriend and I try to see each other as often as we can, but with school, work, and just life in general, sometimes it’s impossible. We still make it work, but I won’t lie—there are times when I feel guilty. When I go out with friends, there’s this nagging feeling that I should be prioritizing him. And at the same time, I’ve had moments where my best friend has felt like I was putting her on the back burner, and that hurt because that was never my intention. I genuinely thought I was doing my best to balance everything, but clearly, something was off. And honestly? That realization stressed me out even more.

I’m a people pleaser. I try not to be, but when it comes to the people I care about, I can’t help it. I want to make sure everyone is okay, that everyone feels valued, that no one is being left behind. But trying to split myself between everyone is exhausting. One day, I’d be giving one person all my attention, and the next, I’d feel guilty because I wasn’t giving someone else the attention they needed. It felt like a never-ending game of tug-of-war, and I was the rope. It started weighing on me in ways I didn’t even realize until it all came crashing down.

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Last week, I broke down at work. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I was so frustrated, so stressed, so emotionally drained that I just lost it. I started crying because I was so tired of feeling pulled in every direction. My sister, bless her, was the one who helped calm me down. She reminded me of something I had completely forgotten: I needed to put myself first. Somewhere along the way, I had lost myself in trying to be everything for everyone else. And that’s not sustainable.

That moment was a wake-up call. I had to start prioritizing myself again. It wasn’t just about making sure my friends and boyfriend were happy—I needed to make sure I was happy too. And in order to do that, I had to take responsibility for my own actions. I had to stop neglecting my own needs. I had been getting lazy, unmotivated, and just overall not feeling like myself, and I realized it was because I wasn’t taking care of myself the way I should have been.

So now, I’m making a change. I’m setting boundaries. I’m making sure that while I’m there for my relationships and friendships, I’m also there for myself. Because at the end of the day, if I don’t take care of myself, how am I supposed to be there for anyone else? I’m making an effort to balance things better—making sure I give time to the people I care about while also making sure I don’t neglect myself in the process. My health, my mental well-being, my responsibilities—they all matter, and I can’t afford to let them slip away just because I’m scared of letting people down.

It’s not easy. You don’t just wake up one day and suddenly have it all figured out. No one does. But sometimes, you need those breaking points—those crash-and-burn moments—to wake you up and make you realize what needs to change. I was depending too much on others to dictate how I felt. If they were upset, I was upset. If they needed me, I’d drop everything, even if it meant pushing aside my own needs. That’s not healthy. My emotions and well-being are my responsibility, and I can’t keep letting them be controlled by everyone else’s needs.

This isn’t to say that the people in my life did anything wrong. This was all on me. I was the one stretching myself too thin, the one not setting boundaries, the one allowing myself to be pulled in every direction. So now, I’m learning. I’m setting those boundaries, creating space when I need to, and reminding myself that it’s okay to say no sometimes.

And if you’ve ever felt this way, please know that you’re not alone. It’s easy to lose yourself in relationships and friendships, to feel like you have to be everything for everyone all the time. But you don’t. You’re allowed to take a step back. You’re allowed to put yourself first.

So moving forward, that’s my goal. I want to continue growing, learning, and being more in tune with what I need. I want to make sure I’m staying on top of things—my assignments, my responsibilities, my well-being. Because for a while, I wasn’t. And I can admit that. But now, I’m getting back to a place where I can prioritize myself again. It’s not an overnight process, but I’m excited to move forward and make the changes I need to make.

Communication is Key

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Communicating in Relationships

This topic gets talked about a lot, yet even today, communication remains one of the hardest things to navigate. People are still learning about it every day, and for good reason. Communication is key, as they say, and it truly can make or break friendships, relationships, or even professional networking. Today, we’re going to dive into how important communication is, how to go about it, what I’ve learned from my own experiences, and what I still have yet to learn.

To put things into perspective, have you ever had a fight with one of your best friends? Not just a small bickering match, but one of those silent fights? A situation where something is clearly off, but neither of you are addressing it? My best friend and I recently went through something like that. For over a month, we had this quiet tension between us, and neither of us knew how to bring it up.

It felt like an unresolved pressure bubbling inside, something we didn’t know how to put into words. We were both struggling with it, knowing something was wrong but unsure of how to communicate it. And mind you, we consider each other best friends. This wasn’t something that would break our friendship, but it was bugging both of us. Eventually, we finally talked about it. We were hanging out when she just laid it all out. She told me exactly how she felt:

She said something like, “You’ve been using me as an outlet for your romantic relationship. I want to be there for you, but I don’t want our friendship to be based on you venting about your relationship struggles all the time. I’m not your couple’s therapist. I’m your best friend, and I want our friendship to be more than just that.”

Hearing that was a moment of clarity for me. I hadn’t realized I was putting her in that position. I was constantly ranting to her about my relationship, then acting like everything was fine afterward, without considering how it was affecting her. I didn’t mean to, but I was making her uncomfortable. And until she told me, I had no idea.

It made me reflect on my actions. Sometimes, we just talk and talk without realizing how it comes across to others. We vent because we need to, but we don’t always think about how the other person is receiving it. When she shared her feelings with me, I didn’t take it personally—I took it as an opportunity to grow. I apologized and acknowledged that I had put her in an unfair situation. That’s when I shared my side of things, too.

For me, I had felt like she was icing me out. I noticed the distance and felt like she didn’t want me around anymore. I’m a confrontational person, I need people to tell me if there’s a problem. If you have an issue with me, I’d rather you say it outright. Otherwise, I’ll be left feeling confused and distant. But since she wasn’t bringing it up, I was getting frustrated.

Looking back, I now realize that I didn’t want to acknowledge the problem either. I sensed what was wrong, but I was avoiding facing it. I was dismissive of the issues between us until she finally voiced her feelings. Once she did, we had an open and honest conversation, and it was such a relief.

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That’s what communication does. It can bring people together or tear them apart. A lack of communication is what creates misunderstandings. What I admire about our friendship is that, even though it took us over a month to address the issue, we weren’t afraid to communicate. We didn’t let it turn into a bigger problem. We said our pieces, made up, and moved forward. Because at the end of the day, our friendship is worth more than a little argument.

I’ve learned to be very intentional about the people I choose to be friends with, especially as I’ve gotten older. I cherish friendships where communication is valued. The fact that my best friend and I were able to sit in her car and talk everything out without any lasting damage to our friendship is something I don’t take for granted.

And that’s the thing—communication doesn’t have to be a dramatic confrontation. It doesn’t have to be yelling or arguing. Sometimes, all it takes is sitting down and having a simple one-on-one conversation.

Listening is just as important as talking. In fact, it might be even more important. You can talk all you want, but if you’re not truly hearing the other person, you’re not really communicating. You have to hear people out, especially the ones you care about.

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Now, shifting into romantic relationships—communication is even more crucial. My boyfriend and I haven’t been together for  long, but I’ve already realized how essential it is. Both of us have a habit of keeping things bottled up sometimes. I tend to overthink things in my head, and so does he. But since I’m the more confrontational one, I usually push him to open up when I sense something is wrong.

He struggles to put his emotions into words, and that can make communication tricky at times. But eventually, we get there. We talk it out, even if it takes some time. There are moments where I let my frustration get the best of me. Sometimes, I get stubborn and don’t want to hear him out at first. But I always have to remind myself that he has feelings too. Our relationship isn’t just about my emotions—it’s about his as well.

It’s easy to focus on how we’re feeling in an argument, but true communication requires empathy. It requires stepping into the other person’s shoes and finding out where they’re coming from. If my boyfriend has trouble expressing himself, I have to be patient and give him the space to do so.

Because, like I said earlier, I tend to take charge in conversations. I’m direct, and I don’t shy away from confrontation. But that can sometimes be intimidating for the other person. So, I’m learning to balance that.

Usually, when my boyfriend and I have disagreements, I get upset first. I react emotionally, and then the next day, I calm down, process everything, and hear him out. And then we figure it out. That’s the pattern I’ve noticed in our relationship, and I’m working on being more mindful of it.

The biggest lesson I’ve learned about communication—whether in friendships or relationships—is the importance of self-awareness. You have to check yourself before you start placing blame on others. You have to ask yourself, “Am I really listening? Am I communicating in a way that let’s the other person to feel safe and heard?”

If communication is something you struggle with, that’s okay. It’s normal. No one is perfect at it. One thing that has helped me a lot is journaling. Writing things down is a form of communication, too. When you put your thoughts on paper, you can see them more clearly. You can process your emotions and figure out what you need to say before you say it.

At the end of the day, communication is a tool. It’s what keeps the world moving. It strengthens relationships, clears up misunderstandings, and helps us connect with one another. If more people took the time to communicate openly and honestly, the world would be a much better place. So, don’t take it for granted—put it to good use.