This year for Christmas I asked for a 23andme test. If you don’t know what that is, similar to Ancestry, it’s a genetic testing service where you send in a saliva sample to a laboratory to be analyzed, using single nucleotide polymorphism genotyping, the service generates reports relating to your ancestry and genetic predispositions related to your health and traits.
You might think this is a weird Christmas present for a 19-year-old girl, I find history and genetics fascinating, but in all honesty, I had a bigger motive in mind.
My dad was born in Quebec in 1964. At only 14 days old he was adopted into a kind Anglo family in Lennoxville, QC. He grew up never knowing his biological family because, in Quebec, adoption laws make it extensive and difficult to trace back your biological parents and adoption records.
My family did some research to find my dad’s mom, but it came down to that it was basically going to cost us upwards of 600 dollars to hire a private investigator, with no guarantee of results. Instead, my dad did an Ancestry test in hopes of finding his bio mom.
In 2018, my dad sent off his saliva to Ancestry thinking he’d match up with his mother, but things didn’t go as expected.
There were no ‘hints’ leading to his biological family, until one day he received an email, not from his mother, but from a young man in Los Angeles.
In the ’80s my dad was quite the young traveller and spent almost a year in Guatemala. He got around and got around I guess and ended up impregnating a Guatemalan woman in the process.
Upon returning to Canada after over a year abroad he received mail from this woman, explaining that she was pregnant with his child and that my dad must come back to Guatemala and marry her. My dad’s first instinct was to do just that. He explained the situation to his buddies in Canada, and they laughed, reassuring him that this was obviously a scam.
And that was that.
My dad moved on with his life, married my mom, had me and my sister, and never returned to Guatemala.
Now back to 2018, my dad receives this ancestry alert and email from a man in LA, who has never known his bio father, born in the same small town in Guatemala my dad was staying in, sharing 50% DNA.
Mission Accomplished? My dad had found his biological family, but not in the way he expected. He and his son (my half brother) hit it off and within a few months, my dad was down in LA watching a Lakers game with his son and granddaughter.
His son, Erik is now a part of our family, and discovering his existence has been an amazing and unbelievable experience and I think in a strange way, it supplemented some of my dad’s feelings of abandonment.
This craziness made the search for his biological mother take the back seat. Until now…
On January 3rd, 2022, I sent off my saliva to 23andme, different than Ancestry, where my dad sent his. Yesterday I received my results.
I got my ancestry report, my predisposed health & traits and my DNA relatives.
The first thing I see is “Grandmother” beside the exact name that had been circulating through the family rumours for years.
Everything about it matched, our DNA, where she lived, worked, it all fit.
I finally had found my dad’s biological mom.
What do I do now?
Good question!
Yesterday I messaged her through 23andme, introducing myself and attached a message from my dad.
She hasn’t been active in over 6 months, so who knows when she will check it next.
I also matched DNA with my dad’s sister, born 2 years after him. It looks as though they share the same mother and father, which brings up a lot of questions. The story always was that his parents were too young (17) to take care of him… but what was the difference in those 2 years?
I hope to answers these questions, but until she responds it’s a waiting game.
But keep in mind, I’m an aspiring little journalist, I can’t sit here and twindle my thumbs. I’ve been doing some extensive internet stalking to pick up clues, trying to figure out where I come from.
It’s strange growing up having no idea where/what I come from. I remember in Elementary school being asked to do family tree projects, having to leave an entire side empty.
My dad was never too optimistic about his roots. Probably a way of coping with the feeling of abandonment. Last night, I found my grandmother’s Linkedin, and she’s still working in her 70’s, an academic, and most importantly seems like a lovely person.
This led me to my aunt’s Linkedin, who is apparently on the board of one of the largest pharmaceutical company’s in the US.
Through her Linkedin, I found her Instagram, and Facebook where I discovered that my dad’s bio sister is actually a twin! Thank god twins are only on my paternal side!
My two aunts have children around my age, so I guess I have a whole new set of cousins?
The craziest part of all this is, none of these people know I exist. I’m peering into their lives, tearing up at the sight of these people who look like me, and they have no clue. They all seem like such kind, amazing and smart people, that I’m proud I’m related to, but who knows maybe they want nothing to do with me and my family.
The whole thing makes me nauseous and it’s all so new. My dad grew up only a couple of miles away from his biological family, isn’t that insane? There are these people living their lives, who share so much DNA with me yet they have no idea we exist.
I hope to update you on what’s to come. But for now, all I can do is wait for a notification that could completely change my life.
