Nobody likes to fail. I hate failing. I bet you hate failing. But it’s inevitable. At one point or another you’re going to have to fail at something. Maybe it’s your driving test, a soccer game, or an exam, whatever it may be, it can make you question everything, from your abilities to your life choices. But what if I told you that failure isn’t just an unfortunate part of life but it can be a  necessary one. I think the trick is to embrace failure, it can be kinda liberating once you own it. I bet you see failure as the enemy, I did too, but in reality, it can be the one thing that can teach you the most. 

Think about it, if everything in life went perfectly all the time, how would you ever learn to handle setbacks? Failure forces you to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and try again. It builds resilience, which is that thing you have that gives you the ability to keep going even when things don’t work out the way you planned. Resilience isn’t just a nice character trait that you may be just lucky to have, it’s essential. Life is going to throw curve balls at you, 100%. But if you know how to handle that and be resilient to pick yourself back up and keep moving forward then you’re in the right place. But if you let every little thing that doesn’t go your way bring you down, then I think now is the time to learn. I can guarantee you that little setbacks won’t be the end of the world, they’re just a part of the journey. 

Once you’ve done something and it didn’t go the way you planned and you’re left with that feeling of failure, that’s the part of your life where it is time to grow. It can be exciting. When you fail at something, you’re given an opportunity to reflect on that, look at what went wrong and why, move on, and improve. If you never failed, you’d never know what you needed to work on. You’d be stuck at the same constant version of you. How boring would that be? Never changing or never learning? I don’t know about you but I’d much rather take the life where I fail hundreds and hundreds of times but get to become a new better version of myself each time. Think about when you learned to walk. You probably don’t remember it, but you fell a lot. But look at you now, you can walk. You didn’t give up when you fell down that first time, you got back up and kept going. You’re never going to just get up and walk the first try. You have to learn to balance, gain strength, how to fall, and of course, how to get back up. The same principle can apply to literally everything we learn in life. Failure is just feedback. It shows you what doesn’t work so you can get closer to what does.

Let’s be real, staying in your comfort zone is nice and cozy. But nothing great ever happens there. Never facing any anxiety in your life can be super comforting and relaxing but never pushing yourself to get out of your comfort zone and try new things just leaves your life stagnant. I’m sure there have been so many times in your life where you have had to face that anxiety and try something new, starting a new sport, a new program at school, or even a job interview. You are always thinking about what could go wrong instead of focusing on all that could go right. I am so guilty of this too. I always stress myself out thinking that I’m not good enough for whatever I’m trying or doing and then once I start out, I realize that all that fear of failure was really for nothing.  

On the flip side of things, sometimes, failing at something makes you realize it wasn’t even what you truly wanted in the first place. When you fail at something sometimes it can bring you clarity that you didn’t know you needed. Maybe you bombed a job interview, but deep down, you didn’t really want that job anyway. Maybe a relationship ended, and while painful, it helped you understand what you truly need in a partner. Failure always has a funny way of redirecting you to where you should be. 

Failing at one thing may open a door for an opportunity that you would have never expected. Maybe something you wanted just didn’t work out, like applying for that school program. Maybe you didn’t get in, you failed, you feel upset with yourself, but what if that failure leads to a new program that you would have never thought that you would’ve enjoyed so much. I know how awful it can feel in the moment but sometimes it’s just all meant to be.

There’s nothing more satisfying than finally succeeding after a long string of failures. If success came easy, it wouldn’t feel nearly as rewarding. The struggle makes the victory that much sweeter. Think about athletes training for years before winning their first competition. Their success means more because of their failures. A good friend of mine took her driver’s road test 3 times before she finally passed! 3! But when she did it made it all worth it and she forgot about all those feelings of failure when she was finally able to feel the freedom of being behind the wheel. 

Failure is a huge character builder. It humbles you, teaches you perseverance, empathy, and patience. It forces you to check your ego and understand that you’re not invincible. And that’s a good thing. Everyone will go through failure so there’s also no need to hide your failure from everyone else as well, sometimes being honest about failing can help you get over it faster too. If there’s one thing that all humans have in common, it’s failing. 

Failure isn’t fun, but it’s necessary, unavoidable, and inevitable. It builds resilience, teaches lessons, pushes you out of your comfort zone, and eventually, will lead you to success. If you can change the way you see failure, not as something to be feared, but as something to embrace, life will get a whole lot easier. So the next time you fail, remember that you’re just one step away from success.