Neurodivergency is IN. Gone is the stigma of the past, and up now is the revelation of what the whole spectrum of neurodivergence means. You know what a spectrum is – picture it like the colour wheel, or the speedometer on your car. You can lay on the 0 end of the spectrum or the high 100, or more, wherever the spectrum ends.
I am specifically on the spectrum of ADHD, diagnosed and everything. Oh boy, the process to get diagnosed is a long one… and anyone with ADHD knows that filling out forms, going for processing meetings, waiting for the final official diagnosis pulls on every string that is exactly what makes being ADHD difficult.
But here, in this article, I am going to share some quirks and tips about how you might assist your ADHD in a neurotypical world.
Let’s start backwards, with sleep. It has been written that ADHDers thrive in the nighttime, are night owls, and struggle with sleep. Why? The information that made the most sense to me was that at the end of the day, that is when life’s demands quiet down and there is little to no stimulation to distract you from what you want to do. Whether its tv show binging, video games, late night schoolwork or career work, the list goes on – no one is there to remind you of your duties and “taking advantage of daylight hours.” The ADHD mind is finally free to do whatever the heck it wants. Sadly this comes at a huge disadvantage because then… you’re physically drained for the next day and it becomes a paradox cycle of when do you actually get the time to do what you want in this work-driven world.
For me specifically, even if my brain and body are in sync and say “Yes, we got this. Go to bed… close your eyes… you’re going to get a good night sleep tonight.” Well… sadly… my brain cannot turn the eff off and actually go to sleep. There’s this weird middle ground I have when I fall asleep. I turn my thoughts into images behind my eyes, and then, if I can relax my brain enough, I space-warp into those images as real-time dreams. The tricky thing, you can never be aware that you are actually falling asleep. One minuscule thought of “Oh yes I am finally falling asleep” and BOOM, you’re awake and the process starts again.
This tip may work for you, or it may not. Every brain is different on the spectrum and what is the gold nugget for one won’t fit another. But I think this is what’s part about being neurodivergent, is that you need to understand how YOUR brain is and find the things that work specifically for your brain. If you haven’t given this a try, maybe it’s your fix.
Audiobooks.
Audiobooks have been a big help for me to transition from awake brain to sleep brain. Sadly I have never been able to fall asleep DURING a story like my partner can, because I just pick such darn good stories. However it does help me trick my brain into bedtime mode. Sometimes I won’t want to go to sleep because the movie I am watching is just so enthralling and my brain doesn’t feel tired yet. Putting on an audiobook that has a shut-off timer gets me laying down, eyes closed, in my dark room, and breathing slowing to a more relaxed state. A great narrator gives me the ability to picture the story behind my closed eyes and relax my brain from the thoughts of the day. A good 45 minutes on the timer and once it slowly fades to off, I am generally ready for a good night sleep. If you need any suggestions of stories, anything by Isaac Asimov will quench your thirst for something fantastical and informative that is far away from anything you might’ve dealt with that day.
Another ADHD tip you might try is called the “everything bins.” Self-care can really take a hit as an ADHDer when your daily life commitments, whether it be school, work, or something else – and for me the first thing I can witness is the cleanliness of my space. Having a messy space can really affect your mood, but also keeping a constantly clean space can really drone on. There are of course cleaning-loving exceptions out there. But if you aren’t one of these naturally clean people, like me, it can take a lot of weight off and some solace with “everything bins.” This is a short-term fix and can bring challenges in itself. But for those quick wins, don’t let shame stop you from taking the easy way out and throwing it alllllllllll into the everything bin. When there comes a time you are capable of cleaning, motivated to clean, or just want to do a little instead of a lot – then you can take an hour or two to slowly sort through this bin. I like to passively unload the bins while I listen to music, or a podcast, or even a tv show. I sort everything into little piles based of what room they go to. Then follow the “every time I stand up rule” I take one thing and put it back. This might not be the tip for everyone, because sometimes everything bins can just continue to stack and stack and suddenly you’re left with 10 bins to sort through. But this tip helps if you need a quick feeling of clean to do the task you’re meant to. Then if you can keep up with the passive sorting, it can make cleaning your whole space feel less overwhelming. We’ve all had it where it’s time to clean and you just look at the everything that needs to get done. Perhaps you’re cleaning your kitchen and can’t help but notice that cabinet you’ve been meaning to reorganize. We ADHDers are very good at continuously adding to the list. At least with the everything bin there is a clear and distinct end. Stop yourself after one bin and it won’t feel like you have to go on and on.
So never fear fellow ADHDer. Navigating the neurotypical world can be difficult, but there are always new strategies around every corner. Remember, your brain will work in waves. What works one day might not work months from now. Keep trying new things, keep giving yourself patience. Our brains require more stimulation and seek more serotonin, so don’t dwell when your new tactic starts to wane. You’ve got comrades like me helping you find new tools every step of the way!
Written by: Volante Matheson
Contact: vmatheson1@my.bcit.ca